“Blessed is he who is not ashamed of Me.”
Thank you Lord for saying that. You know my heart.
As humbled as I am by You, there are those who would feel more comfortable should I never mention You again.
I can see in their eyes that they feel some sort of unwanted pity for me. From their eyes streams their inner most thoughts. They say to themselves, “How can she humiliate herself like that? How can someone like her go off the deep end and believe so passionately in the insanity she speaks? She must be crazy and dangerous to believe such nonsense.”
Oh Lord with this gift you’ve bestowed upon me I can literally see, sense and feel their thoughts and even their inner most thoughts. Oh Lord, how do I just be, knowing now all what You’ve shown me?
I am becoming more and more predominant over my flesh. I know I am spirit and I am hungry.
I do not like what I am beginning to see in mankind around me. They are filled with self indulged and induced pride. They take offense to Your messages being delivered from me. It is almost a reaction as, “Who do you think you are? We have knowledge of God and who are you to say it is not enough?” Those words are never spoken but the discernment within me reads their true thoughts.
I say to them that I am only Your messenger sent to gather Your sheep and feed them with the Words You’ve given me. I plead desperately for them to understand that these are Your Words, not mine. They say I’m judging.
I of course deny that because it is utterly untrue. I am simply delivering Your messages as You have instructed me.
I try to explain Your way and how You confirm to me what You say You will. In their human thinking they respond saying it’s illogical. Lord, I don’t even know where to begin. Their lack of understanding of You and Your way is overwhelming. But I know who You put in front of me is there for a reason.
There is no foundation to begin with in some. Some have been touched by You somewhere in their lives but do not know how to explain and dismiss any discussion. Those who are willing to talk about an experience they believe to maybe be with You, will NEVER admit that they believe it to be You. They call it spiritualism or some far-fetched, man-made explanation. I sit with a straight face but inside You know exactly what is going on.
Lord, where do I begin?
Oh God, I do not doubt You.
I doubt me.
Are You certain that I am the one to do this? I feel as a child unsure of my footing. How can I begin to explain, to teach?
I did not realize that with the deliverance of Your Word would come questions. Many questions they all have. Questions that reveal to me how little they know of You. For if they knew You and Your Word as they profess, then they would not be asking me what they ask. Because of their pride and lack of knowledge they offend easily.
I find myself frustrated to where I cry and want to give up. My heart feels sick.
Dear Father please teach me how to deliver Your messages without offense. I want no human praise. I seek it not.
I seek to bring You glory and to bear You much fruit because this is what You have commanded me to do.
You tell me that where there is chaos and anarchy and argumentative behaviour in Your name, that satan is present. That I am no longer to discuss You or Your Word in his presence. Stop immediately without explanation, for explanation I owe to no one.
Stop because that is how satan will trap me into anger which is of him. Because he knows my human flesh is weak. He knows that now is not the time when You want me to draw my sword, so he will taunt me to anger and trap me into sin through my friends and strangers alike. I am only to discuss You in peace, love, compassion, understanding and direct truth. That You will guide my words and I will speak without fear.
So, I come to You through Your Son Jesus Christ and I beg You to have mercy on everyone I love and open their hearts to the truth. To You, because You are pure truth. Please bring them to Your Son in order that they might come to You. Jesus taught us that no one can go to You unless they go through Him first. And that the only ones that will come to Him are the ones You call to Him.
So Father again I come to You through Your Son Jesus Christ and I beg You, should it be Your will, call them to Your Son should there be time enough, so that they too can feel the love You have for them and that they can begin to understand who they really are. And Lord please stay with me and give me the strength to continue what we have only just begun. I have only sampled a taste of what is to come. Help me to rise above it and keep my wits about me. Help me to deliver Your messages as You want them delivered in order to bring glory and honour to Your Name. The Name You gave Your Son.
You tell me that You are sending me out as a sheep amongst wolves. To be wise as a serpent and as harmless as a dove. Not to be anxious about what I’m going to say because it will not be me speaking. That the Spirit of You will speak through me. I must give all that You give me freely to everyone who is hungry. To seek out the hungry and give my time where it is needed. If Your Word is rejected I am not to force feed anyone. There is no time. I am to seek out Your lost and hungry lambs and feed them Your Word.
Lord, give me the strength to walk away, should it be the ones that I love, who reject You.
Oh Lord give me the courage to do Your will to the extent of Your commandment.
“Blessed are you when people abuse you and persecute you and speak all kinds of untruths and slander against you for My sake. Rejoice and be glad! For your reward will be great in Heaven as it was for the prophets persecuted before you.”
Thank You for hearing me Lord. I know You always hear me.