I sit here quiet where You requested that I sit. I’m listening now Lord and laugh out loud when You prompt me to stop and sit. Sit in places I would never on my own.
Laughing at heart, You know my questions.
Who are these people? Why do You want me to sit here?
I do anyway and order a beer. You have provided perfect weather and the warmth of the sun to create a comfortable place to be.
Over an hour later, sitting on this unfamiliar terrace, a family arrives and takes their place at a table near to me.
There You are in all Your glory. Sitting in a stroller too small for Your build. You are mangled in Your limbs and Your speech does not exist. Everyone around You fully healthy yet seem tired and worn out with life. There is not a smile at Your table with the exception of Yours.
You moan with joy and tears stream from Your eyes at any and everything around You. Your smile lights up the terrace and the sun beams brighter presenting You in all Your glory.
The glow from only one Sunray reveals the halo all around Your head.
All of a sudden I see You notice me writing. You smile at me and melt my heart.
I am so Yours Lord and now You are revealing Yourself to me plainly through Your loved ones.
The family is healthy yet troubled.
You are mangled yet joyful.
Dear Lord, I am so unworthy of what You are revealing to me.
I am in tears of joy and desperate guilt. How could I not see You before? I see You now in everything when I always thought I already did. But now You make it happen before my human eyes. Oh Lord, please forgive me for not knowing, for not seeing, for not understanding and for running away from Your glory for all these years.
All of a sudden I need to ask myself, to ask You, “What have I been doing?”
Oh Jesus Christ forgive me for my human self. You know I will walk on broken glass if it is Your will. Help me to remain strong and remain in this flesh for as long as You need me.
I am Yours Lord, use me as You will.